I’ve found that To-Do lists provide me with vital instructions on what to do with myself each day, since brain fog and an open schedule leave me prone to screwing around and wasting my life. Or perhaps the real problem is just that I fear the latter.
Before bed, I scrawl out ten or fifteen things I hope to accomplish the following day. If I didn’t do this, I’d spend the first half of my day just trying to get my blubbery self together, but by nightfall, thoughts of, ‘I- shoulda-coulda-done-this-or-that, would be floating through my head. Ah, the bedtime recriminations! So unhealthy for a Lymie!
Hence, the To-Do list allows me to sleep confidently, knowing I’ll know where to put my wandering energies upon arising.
Problem is, as a stubborn type-A’er, I tend to forget I’m sick when I think of what I need to do the following day, and end up making a To-Do list better suited for Superman.
Sometimes, I catch myself, but justify the two thousand activities by telling myself, “Well, just in case you have extra time, you’ll have something else to catch up on…”
When do I EVER have extra time? When do I ever finish the To-Do list with time to spare? Never!
So the thing intended to reduce my daily stress levels has, at times, put me in fast-forward mode, as I strive to accomplish all the daily goals I set for myself.
Why can’t I let some of it go? Do I really need to do laundry today? Can’t I make do with the blow-out pair of undies? (JK…)
Anyway, I’m learning that cutting my daily responsibilities down to size is a crucial step in my healing process. The To-Do-Or-Die list creates pressure to perform–which is an immense stress on the adrenal glands.
But it yet surprises me how difficult it is to counter the crazy notions of accomplishment!
Still, the To-Do list remains a useful tool for my tired existence, as long as I am able to discern when enough is enough.